All wrapped up?

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THERE’S a reason that children love Christmas. The only thing they need to worry about is writing a well considered gift list.

But unless you choose to live with your parents forever, there is no escaping the fact that, at some point, you’ll need to start buying presents for others. And that’s when Christmas can become complicated.

Despite the old adage, “It’s the thought that counts”, the pressure to buy large quantities of expensive gifts seems to get greater every year.

As Kate Reardon, editor of new book Top Tips For Girls, points out, gift giving can be an emotional process.

“There’s a balance between investing too much emotion in your gifts and not being thoughtful enough,” Kate says.

“If you’ve spent months of your life putting sweat and tears into this thing and you get a book voucher, it can be upsetting. And there’s nothing worse than being resentful on Christmas morning.”

Popular fiction writer Cecelia Ahern, whose new book, The Gift, comes out just in time for Christmas, agrees that striking the balance between pleasing people and not going present-mad isn’t easy.

“I love getting presents. This year, I’ve actually done all my Christmas shopping already. Last year, I pared back a lot because I realised that I didn’t have to be embarrassed about not always having a gift for people. I’m sure some people would rather not get you one next year. But at the end of the day, you can’t always get the etiquette right. So don’t freak out, and just accept that it’s all part of Christmas.”

Cecelia, who lives in Dublin, says she has noticed that people are often more obsessed with buying presents than the gifts themselves.

“I live in the city, and it struck me last year just how much people are spending and how the panic starts in October. People get Christmas fever. They don’t have time to think and just grab things from shelves and race to the till. Everybody get stressed and then it gets to Christmas day and we’re all shattered.”

The writer, whose first novel, PS I Love You, was made into a Hollywood film starring Hilary Swank, believes that tactics such as re-gifting are an excellent way to keep things under control.

“I don’t think re-gifting is a bad thing. A gift is a gift. The point isn’t how much it costs or whether it came off a shelf, but whether you think the person will adore it.”

And Kate Reardon adds that those who find it really hard to meet their present obligations can always use the credit crunch as an excuse.

“If you are really worried about what people might think, blame everything on forces beyond your control, like the recession. And don’t be afraid to give home-made gifts like Christmas tree decorations, biscuits or even a voucher for your time.”

Kate suggests adopting pragmatic present-giving policies in order to keep your friends, colleagues and relatives happy.

“Definitely don’t buy for people who don’t buy for you, and don’t be afraid to make agreements with people,” she says.

“Let them know that you’ll only be buying for close family and friends, so they don’t buy for you and no one feels guilty. They’ll probably be hugely relieved. Or if you are in a gift-giving frenzy, agree with your friends that no one will spend more than £5.”

Both writers agree that paying attention to your loved ones throughout the year will pay dividends at Christmas.

“If someone mentions something to me that they really want, I’ll scribble it down and try to remember it for later,” says Cecelia.

Kate has good news for the financially challenged who fret about coming up with the goods.

“A great present is never about throwing money at it,” she says.

“If it is, you need to look at your relationship with that person. I would much rather someone gave me two bars of soap of a scent that I love – the kind of thing I wouldn’t have justified for myself but is lovely and won’t break the bank.”

Jane Hudson, who set up the websites www.presentsformen.com and www.giftsforthegirls.com, says that, in her experience, there are three fail-safe rules of gift buying.

“Things that make people smile. Presents that also have a practical application – especially during a recession. And things that are innovative.”

Finally, if you are finding the whole process impossibly complicated, Kate suggests tackling the process like a man.

“Most men can’t understand why women get their knickers in a twist about it. For them, it’s more of a practical process. So for a stress-free Christmas, adopt a male attitude. Buy one thing for one person, wrap it in brown paper and go back to the TV. Job done.”

Kate Reardon gives her top tips for avoiding Christmas faux pas:

Make a budget and a gift list – and stick to them.

Tell people your present-giving plans. If you make it clear from the start who you intend to buy for, there will be no feelings hurt come Christmas.

Buy throughout the year and wrap as you go so you don’t have that epic mountain at the end. But remember to label the presents.

Don’t be afraid to give home-made gifts such as decorations and cakes. It’s not about splashing the cash.

Don’t buy for people who don’t buy for you.

Keep a present drawer so that you can recycle presents. But it is essential to label them so you don’t give presents back to the same person.

Personalise presents. If you’ve given someone socks a million times, this time get their initials sewn on.

If you are buying for other people’s children, ask the parents what they would like, or ask other people in toy shops with children the same age. Don’t ever be afraid to ask strangers their opinion. Everyone likes being asked for advice.