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15 best jokes at this year’s Edinburgh Fringe Festival

The top 15 jokes from the Edinburgh Fringe Festival
The top 15 jokes from the Edinburgh Fringe Festival

Masai Graham’s quip about heart donation has been named Dave’s Funniest Joke of the Fringe at the Edinburgh Festival.

Here are the top 15 jokes as voted for by 2,000 respondents:

1. “My dad has suggested that I register for a donor card. He’s a man after my own heart” by Masai Graham

2. “Why is it old people say “there’s no place like home“, yet when you put them in one…” by Stuart Mitchell

3. “I’ve been happily married for four years – out of a total of 10” by Mark Watson

4. “Apparently one in three Britons are conceived in an Ikea bed which is mad because those places are really well lit” by Mark Smith

5. “I went to a pub quiz in Liverpool, had a few drinks so wasn’t much use. Just for a laugh I wrote The Beatles or Steven Gerrard for every answer… came second” by Will Duggan

6. “Brexit is a terrible name, sounds like cereal you eat when you are constipated” by Tiff Stevenson

7. “I often confuse Americans and Canadians. By using long words” by Gary Delaney

8. “Why is Henry’s wife covered in tooth marks? Because he’s Tudor” by Adele Cliff

9. “Don’t you hate it when people assume you’re rich because you sound posh and went to private school and have loads of money?” by Annie McGrath

10. “Is it possible to mistake schizophrenia for telepathy, I hear you ask” by Jordan Brookes

11. “Hilary Clinton has shown that any woman can be President, as long as your husband did it first” by Michelle Wolf

12. “I spotted a marmite van on the motorway. It was heading yeastbound“ by Roger Swift

13. “Back in the day, Instagram just meant a really efficient drug dealer“ by Arthur Smith

14. “I’ll tell you what’s unnatural in the eyes of God. Contact lenses” by Zoe Lyons

15. “Elton John hates ordering Chinese food. Soya seems to be the hardest word” by Phil Nicol

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