Greta Thunberg is great. She tells it like it is. The switched-on Swedish teen activist has been sharing that she doesn’t regard Scotland as a world leader on climate change.
Greta reckons some countries “do a bit more than others” but none come close to what’s needed. On the power-sharing SNP and Scottish Greens deal, Ms Thunberg muttered that some politicians were “less worse” than others.
That must have stung. Progress on climate change is dismal. Neither the UK nor Scotland’s politicos should be patting anyone on the back – least of all themselves. You wait till wee Patrick Harvie of the Greens starts thumping his wee fist on the table and asserting to Nicola what he wants. Will it make a difference? Nah, not holding my breath either.
Still on search for Good Samaritan
It made a difference to us to hear from concerned readers after I wrote how Mrs X and I got into a stooshie at Pizza Express in Inverness. When a young individual began to bad-mouth Mrs X and call her names that even I don’t get away with, he and I had a forehead-to-forehead moment. Then I was rescued by a softly-spoken guy in a security guard’s uniform. He took over and diplomatically ushered away the persistent pest.
Benign? Me? I don’t think I have ever thought of myself as benign. Call me fine and I’ll be thine, but not benign.
A supportive unsigned letter sent to the P&J and onto myself last week, declared: “This particular person was probably attracted by your benign and kindly appearance so thought he’d “have a go”.” Benign? Me? I don’t think I have ever thought of myself as benign. Call me fine and I’ll be thine, but not benign. That’s gentle, kind and, medically, harmless. My dander was up. Sorry, despite my outward Brad Pitt-type coolness, I wasn’t benign on the inside.
Methinks I recognise this handwriting. This may be a former regular who was moved to pick up a pen again. If you are who I think you are, it assures me some Invernessians are, contrary to my experience, actually very nice. Most of the people round here just said they wished I had been walloped and knocked onto my backside. Then I really would have something interesting to write about – for a change. That stung.
I did not get to thank that guard properly which is why I want to find him. His dreadlocks are about all I can remember after the adrenaline rush.
Serving up Airbnb confusion
Rushing back on the ferry after the contretemps with the pizza pain, I met a man from Harris who was amazed how many visitors had been staying down there but were leaving now as the end of the season neared. After restrictions eased, he had realised a lot of Harris people with a spare cottage or two were now doing Airbnb. He could not understand its popularity and he asked me how it all worked and how it had become so popular. I explained it was an online system used for booking bed-and-breakfasts or small holiday cottages.
Many Airbnbs actually don’t offer breakfast at all, I told him. He couldn’t figure out why it was called Airbnb. It was just clever marketing, I said. Airbnb was just short for air bed-and-breakfast. He scratched his head and said: “Och, that’s just a fad. It won’t catch on. Breakfast or not, the last thing I would want is to stay for a week in a wee cottage on a blow-up bed.”
No, I meant … I’d explained enough. My lower back would ache on an airbed though and I’d be at the quack. That would be my sting in the tail.
All abuzz at doctor’s surgery
This housewife, let’s call her Rachel, got badly stung by a wasp in her garden the other day. She phoned the surgery and to her surprise, after telling them of her pain and suffering, got asked to go in. No phone consultation, no fuzzy Facetime video of her swollen neck – just come. The doctor will see you now. Off went Rachel.
She was not kept waiting very long. The doctor, who must remain nameless or I will be in big trouble, asked where she was stung. She showed him the big red circle on the side of her neck. As the doc examined the bite, Rachel said: “You should have seen it. It was a really, really big wasp.” The GP assured her saying: “Don’t worry. I’ll put some cream on it.” Rachel replied: “There is no way you can catch it. That wasp will be miles away by now.”
