Calendar An icon of a desk calendar. Cancel An icon of a circle with a diagonal line across. Caret An icon of a block arrow pointing to the right. Email An icon of a paper envelope. Facebook An icon of the Facebook "f" mark. Google An icon of the Google "G" mark. Linked In An icon of the Linked In "in" mark. Logout An icon representing logout. Profile An icon that resembles human head and shoulders. Telephone An icon of a traditional telephone receiver. Tick An icon of a tick mark. Is Public An icon of a human eye and eyelashes. Is Not Public An icon of a human eye and eyelashes with a diagonal line through it. Pause Icon A two-lined pause icon for stopping interactions. Quote Mark A opening quote mark. Quote Mark A closing quote mark. Arrow An icon of an arrow. Folder An icon of a paper folder. Breaking An icon of an exclamation mark on a circular background. Camera An icon of a digital camera. Caret An icon of a caret arrow. Clock An icon of a clock face. Close An icon of the an X shape. Close Icon An icon used to represent where to interact to collapse or dismiss a component Comment An icon of a speech bubble. Comments An icon of a speech bubble, denoting user comments. Ellipsis An icon of 3 horizontal dots. Envelope An icon of a paper envelope. Facebook An icon of a facebook f logo. Camera An icon of a digital camera. Home An icon of a house. Instagram An icon of the Instagram logo. LinkedIn An icon of the LinkedIn logo. Magnifying Glass An icon of a magnifying glass. Search Icon A magnifying glass icon that is used to represent the function of searching. Menu An icon of 3 horizontal lines. Hamburger Menu Icon An icon used to represent a collapsed menu. Next An icon of an arrow pointing to the right. Notice An explanation mark centred inside a circle. Previous An icon of an arrow pointing to the left. Rating An icon of a star. Tag An icon of a tag. Twitter An icon of the Twitter logo. Video Camera An icon of a video camera shape. Speech Bubble Icon A icon displaying a speech bubble WhatsApp An icon of the WhatsApp logo. Information An icon of an information logo. Plus A mathematical 'plus' symbol. Duration An icon indicating Time. Success Tick An icon of a green tick. Success Tick Timeout An icon of a greyed out success tick. Loading Spinner An icon of a loading spinner.

Iain Maciver: Bidding fond farewell to Bond and Tesler, father of copy and paste Bidding fond fa…

ROTTEN YEAR: 2020 claimed stars many of us grew up watching including James Bond icon Sir Sean Connery and Barbara Windsor.
ROTTEN YEAR: 2020 claimed stars many of us grew up watching including James Bond icon Sir Sean Connery and Barbara Windsor.

Would anyone like a turkey sandwich? If you say “Yes”, I might just post it to you. Mrs X was being far too generous because every time I tried to eat one I fell asleep – probably because they were so thick I had to yawn to get them in my mouth. We don’t usually have a big bird in this house most years but this was no ordinary year and we got the opportunity, so it’s turkey curry again tonight for me.

It was also probably because the world is so topsy-turvy that we reverted to very traditional fare with traditional trimmings and traditional pastimes – such as slumping in the chair, snoring, shouting “Why do they never put anything decent on the telly at Christmas any more”, and watching that musical for people who hate musicals – Calamity Jane. Calam is one fictional character I would like to see as prime minister. That tomboy gunslinger would fix even Brexit.

Oh heck, we have a deal. What happens now? Who knows? It is going to be heaven or it will be hell – that still depends on who you listen to. Labour’s Sir Keir Starmer thinks it’s OK but many others in his party think it is a rubbish agreement and want to sink it. Oh, here we go again …

Iain Maciver

The British exit from the European Union is what Brexit is, of course. I have always wondered what the Europeans say in their own languages. I doubt if the French and the rest of the EU use our English term, Brexit. They’ll describe us with something ending in U. Yep. Maybe adiEU? Of course.

Perhaps our fears are unfounded. Maybe Brexit will be a good thing. I’m not sure fishermen agree the deal is the best. Other supporters of Brexit, however, say it will make no difference at all because we make nothing much in Britain these days. All the hi-tech jobs are in faraway countries. I’m just looking at the back of the radio on my desk and it says Built In Antenna. Blimey, that is one country I have never even heard of.

There is talk of extensions to deadlines already. Surely it will all be finalised soon. You can just see what could happen. The year is 2080 and the British prime minister visits Brussels to ask for an extension of the Brexit deadline. No one remembers how the tradition began but every year the annual spectacle attracts tourists from all over the world.

I have just had my annual note from a reader asking me to announce what my new year resolutions will be. What is the point of promises of performance in a pandemic? We don’t know what’s in store for 2021. Mind you, maybe we should keep up these traditions. My new year resolution at the end of 2019 was about staying away from people who are always negative. This time my resolution is about staying away from people who test positive.

Like Boris Johnson when he caught coronavirus. He was rushed to hospital and put on that new ventilator made by Dyson. It was soon announced he was picking up nicely.

Seriously, we should take a moment to remember those who passed away in this rotten year. Covid claimed its share – so many that we have become numbed to the daily tallies on the news. It is, of course, those we knew from their appearances in our living rooms that most of us will really remember – many of them were in that corner since we were growing up.

There are just so many. I am thinking of Sir Sean Connery, Barbara Windsor, Stirling Moss, Des O’Connor, Bobby Ball and someone I met a couple of times, country singer Charley Pride of hits like Kiss An Angel Good Morning and Crystal Chandeliers. Well, Mrs X was the superfan but I had to go along to make sure she didn’t whisper to him “All I have to offer you is me”. I didn’t want anyone kissing her good morning, the wee angel that she is. Right,that is quite enough smoochiness.

Lastly, I want to pay a fond farewell to Larry Tesler, a computer scientist who has helped me and everyone else who has ever used a computer. He passed away in February at age 74. Larry, of course, was best known for inventing copy and paste. Larry, of course, was best known for inventing copy and paste. Larry, of course, was best known for inventing…

Already a subscriber? Sign in

[[title]]

[[text]]