I am raging aboot Aiberdeen’s John Lewis closing doon – Tanya Souter, lifestyle guru
I da ken aboot youse, but I am raging aboot Aiberdeen’s John Lewis closing doon. True, I didna ging in very often masel, but ivery time I’ve got engaged I’ve pit my wedding list there and got some lovely stuff afore crying aff the wedding.
It’s a tragedy for a’ the fowk fa work there, and it’s bad news for the city centre as a whole – fan shops reopen, there’ll be nae shops tae reopen.
My pal Big Sonya used tae love John Lewis, fit wi’ it’s knowledgeable staff, high quality stock plus the dependable blind spots in the CCTV. The cafe wis a bosker an’ a’. Fit wi’ Debenhams gone and noo this, Markies is the only game in toon. Their restaurant is gaan tae be that crammed wi’ aul’ wifies it’ll look like a Daniel O’Donnell concert.
So fit tae dae? Weel, ye can tell it’s a shop for middle class folk, ‘cause they are a’ready organising a petition. Naeb’dy wis logging on tae Change.org fan the shutters went doon on Christie’s 99p store, wis they? Cooncillors and Chamber o’ Commerce heid yins hiv swung into action wi’ a campaign o’ asking John Lewis bosses really nicely tae change their minds. I wish them weel, but I dinna ‘hink ‘at’s foo big business works, is it?
The ‘hing is, as John Lewis’ says theirsels, there’s been a signif’cant increase in online shopping fit naebdy can see being reversed. And especially noo, fan we’ve a’ got used tae nae shops being open onywye, fa wints tae ging trailing a’ ower the toon fan ye can press a few buttons files sitting on yer sofa and hae yer shopping conveniently chucked in yer wheelie bin the very next day?
Actual shops is at a disadvantage versus online retail ‘cos unlike the likes o’ Amazon they hiv tae pay rent and rates, and their staff a living wage, and tax. So it’s nae contest is it?
But the real question for me is, fit tae dae wi’ the building? It’s been a distinctive local eyesore for decades noo, but for all it looks like a tortoise made oot o’ sticklebricks, we love it. So I reckon if we wint tae get folk aff their sofas and back intae toon one day we need tae pit something in there that folk canna resist.
Fit aboot the world’s biggest Greggs?
Cava Kenny Cordiner, the football pundit who’s keeping an open mind
There is an old saying what says “a week is a long time in polytechnics”. Well, in the wide wide world of world of sport seven days can feel like an entity!
The Red Army has been waiting on tent hooks to find out who was going to be replacing Derek McInnes in the Pittodrie hot tub. As soon as the jungle gums broke the story that it might be former Dandy Stephen Glass, Old Kenny seen straight through it. Especially seeing as he was already the reserve team coach over at new Chairman Dave Cormack’s other club, Atlantis FC.
You can’t blame Super Dave, to be fair. He must have looked at how The Rangers has turned things around and decided “We need our own version of Stevie G”.
My mole down at Pittodrie tells me his first choices was either ‘Police Academy’ star Steve Guttenburg, or saxophonist Kenny G, but apparently neither of them don’t know nothing about managing a football team – so hiring them would have been just like when they give the job to Mark McGhee.
But with Glass’s appointment confirmed, the next bit of recruitment news from the Dons come as more than a bit of a surprise. To be honest, when I hears it, I had to punch myself.
The last 12 months has seen its fair share of hard-to-believe headlines, but “Scott Brown signs for Aberdeen” must take the brisket.
Celtic’s midfield hard nut has been a derisive figure for the Aberdeen faithful over the years, halfing opponents with impurity and getting dogs abuse from the fans for his troubles, but now he is on his way up the A90 next season to be Glass’s right hand handyman. You couldn’t not make it up!
I’ll be interested to see if Brown can get the Red Army onside. He arrives at the club as persona non-gratin, a bit like if the Big Bad Wolf had signed for the Three Little Pigs, but putting club loyalties aside you has to admire his record as a player – 109 yellows and 7 reds. That’s nearly as good as mines.