I remember my pals coming to life at the mention of McDonald’s during our pre-school and pre-teen years. It was as if they’d been doused in rocket fuel, or eaten the contents of the kitchen’s sugar tin.
The golden arches and plastic Happy Meal toys (that provided entertainment for no longer than a few minutes, in my opinion) never fazed me.
I didn’t understand the hype at all.
Instead, I’d beam from ear to ear when a visit to The Ashvale was on the cards.
The award-winning business – which was founded almost 40 years ago in 1985 – boasts locations in Aberdeen (on Great Western Road and Jesmond Drive), Elgin, Banchory and Inverurie.
The latter was always our go-to, with it being the closest to our family home.
One thing, however, that would make my nose screw up was the imminent sentence, “you have to order off the kids menu, Karla.”
It wasn’t down to the quality of the dishes by any means, but (I won’t beat around the bush) I was greedy and had no concept of portion control.
The more food, the better.
You could say that my latest work outing allowed me to fulfil a childhood fantasy.
It was time to take on The Ashvale Whale.
Fulfilling a childhood fantasy at The Home of the Whale, The Ashvale
I’d wanted to try finish The Ashvale Whale for years, purely because I believed I could.
After failing miserably at my first food challenge attempt back in September, hosted by Elgin’s Humble Burger and Foggie’s Bar, I had a point to prove – not just to myself, but to P&J readers.
I’d been messaging operations director at The Ashvale, Stuart Devine, about arranging a time for me to stop by before we landed on 12.30pm yesterday.
At first (on entering the restaurant), I was hit with nostalgia, then came the aroma of fresh foods frying away in the kitchen.
The Ashvale Whale: what is it and what do you win if you beat it?
The Ashvale Whale is a well-known north-east dish created by the team at The Ashvale.
It’s been on the go for roughly 35 years, and was introduced to the menu as a way to attract more customers with it being seen as ‘a challenge’ to many.
A great idea as it’s done just that. Stuart told me The Ashvale Whale has been ordered “thousands and thousands of times.”
It comprises a one-pound haddock fillet – which you can request battered or breaded – a hefty serving of chips, plus peas (mushy or garden), beans or coleslaw. I went for mushy peas.
Regardless of whether you win or lose, the dish costs £19.95. However, if you finish The Whale, you can eat a second one on the house or enjoy a free dessert of your choice.
You also receive a certificate and can take home a £2.50 ‘I’ve tackled The Ashvale Whale – and won’ mug.
There is no time limit. However, as P&J photographer Kath was only going to be with me to document the journey for roughly 45 minutes, I gave myself one.
Holy carp, that’s a big fish…
I don’t know if fasting beforehand was the best idea, but that’s the route I took. I was famished.
The haddock – coated in a golden, light and crispy batter – was huge.
Duh, Karla.
I immediately cut the fish into sections to allow it to cool down as I wanted to tackle it first. One thing I refused to do was burn my mouth off the bat and not be able to enjoy my lunch.
It was delicious, which I expected given that the business is known for its fresh fish (among other things).
You can have as much sauce as you like with it, but I didn’t bother adding any. The same goes for the two lemon wedges, I left them be.
The fish was juicy and flavourful enough to go down on its own. And I didn’t want to mask it.
I don’t know whether Kath was impressed or disgusted at how quickly I devoured the haddock. The same goes for Stuart, who saw my plate roughly 10 minutes in and gave me some words of encouragement.
There were other diners in too, including a table of five at the far rear corner of the restaurant. Three of them had also ordered The Ashvale Whale.
As they were leaving the restaurant, I asked how they got on.
“We all finished, but it was a struggle. You can do it, you’re doing well!” said one of them.
Knowing that they’d tanned the lot ignited the fire in my belly even more. Or was that the batter settling?
Whale devoured, how did I get on with the rest of the plate?
I still had the thick chips, which were nice and fluffy, and peas to go. The mushy peas were a superb choice as they were soft and creamy in texture, helping the chips go down.
Another thing I loved about the food was that it wasn’t salty. Had everything been doused in salt, I’d have floundered.
The chips and peas were going down a treat, and I lost track of the number of times I said how great the food was to Kath.
Before finishing everything off, I took a quick breather. This turned out to be a mistake because the chips had cooled down, making them a bit trickier to eat.
But I was far too close to the finish line, so got them down swiftly.
I previously wondered if Kath was impressed or disgusted. When I saw her face as I cleaned the plate with the last remaining chip, I knew it was the latter.
“I can’t believe you’ve eaten all that,” she laughed.
The Ashvale Whale was completed.
A round of applause sounded in my head.
Feeling a bit too big for my boots (literally), I ordered a free dessert – millionaire’s cheesecake served with heavy cream, whipped cream and ice cream. And I will say it was top tier, despite the fact I’d already eaten around 2,000 calories.
After taking a few bites, Kath announcing that she had to shoot off and realising I had to drive home with a one-pound haddock in my stomach, the headache entered the chat.
How I felt after I’d fin-ished
Because Stuart had to set off to one of the Aberdeen Ashvale branches when I was about halfway through my plate, I said I’d pop him a message later to let him know how I got on.
I did, and was chuffed to bring good news.
Stuart was a delight from the offset, happily answering my long list of questions about The Ashvale Whale and chatting away with customers. His staff were smashing too.
The Ashvale has always had a friendly, homely atmosphere, and my trip yesterday reminded me why I was such a big fan of the business when I was little.
I left with my certificate, mug, and a balloon for a stomach.
P&J Features Team Leader Kieran Beattie joked that I should get the certificate framed. It’s not quite a diploma, Kieran, but I appreciate the enthusiasm.
My food crash kicked in when I got home. Even now, I can’t see myself being enticed by any foods for the foreseeable.
I’d highly recommend trying to tackle The Ashvale Whale if you haven’t already. Everything on my plate was delicious.
And maybe one day Stuart will try it out for himself…
Conversation