Two women living on the same Aberdeen street discovered they both have ADHD – and are now challenging misconceptions about the condition.
Laura Mears-Reynolds and Dawn Farmer have three things in common: They live in the city’s old fishing village Fittie, are both 39 years old and both have ADHD.
Both women only discovered they had the condition recently after growing up with the false assumption that it’s only ever present in young males.
The stereotype of ‘hyperactive little boys’
Laura spent her childhood struggling with consistency and focus. She could go from getting As in class to struggling to have the concentration to write her name.
She explained: “Three years ago a friend told me she’d been diagnosed.
“I was so surprised because I had the stereotype in my mind that it’s hyperactive little boys, but she explained how differently it can present in females.
“I jokingly said: ‘If you’ve got it, I’ve definitely got it’ and she went: ‘When I found out about it you were the first person I thought of’.
“It’s funny because it was prevalent in childhood but because it wasn’t something people thought girls had, the symptoms weren’t known.
“In the subjects I could hyper-focus on I was doing so well, but then in others I was doing so badly.
“Even in the same subject on any given day, I could walk into the classroom and get As and the next day barely be able to concentrate enough to write my name.”
‘I went from job to job – never longer than two years’
Like Laura, Dawn also found it was “always little boys” used as examples of ADHD.
It wasn’t until recently she discovered why she’d kept jumping from job to job, and has gained a newfound confidence as a result.
“I left school at 16 to pursue hairdressing and actually went to college twice to do that – and both times ended up pulling out,” she said.
“Something I’ve noticed over time is that I have trouble maintaining consistency, whether it’s a job, a course, friendships or relationships.
“I’ll go into things with full passion and then over time I just cannot keep that level of consistency.
“I went from job to job, I didn’t stay any longer than two years.
“I needed something fresh and exciting to keep me interested.”
However, Dawn is now studying 3D Design at Robert Gordon University.
Since speaking to the university’s educational psychologist, she underwent an assessment which concluded she displayed all the symptoms of ADHD.
Teaming up to break ADHD stigma
The friendship between Laura and Dawn has helped them both understand and embrace who they are.
Laura joked: “Dawn doesn’t have to pretend to me that she’s put her washing away before I come round – we’re both in the same boat which is really nice.
“On one of the days where one of us feel a bit inept like ‘maybe I should have done more of this’ we can understand how the other one is feeling, the compassion is there.”
The pair have been able to relate to each other about things they never could with others – even finding some people still believe ADHD isn’t a real condition.
“People form opinions that it isn’t real because they can’t see it,” Laura said.
“If you don’t educate yourself or you’ve never come across it, there’s this idea they’re just pretending.”
Last month Laura and Dawn started recording and launched their own podcast, ADHD As Females, to help show others the reality of the condition.
They only have a few episodes under their belts, but they’ve already achieved 1,000 downloads and helped forge other new connections.
Laura added: “We’ve had a lot of people messaging us saying their families don’t believe them or even doctors have said it’s now ‘trendy’ because of the awareness been raised.
“There’s still a stigma, but it just spurs us on more to keep pushing.
“This is affecting people in so many ways, it’s really serious.”
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