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“Tweed and tiaras terrify me” says Aberdeenshire duchess

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Leaves crunch underfoot on the narrow and winding driveway to Elsick House, and the hedges which normally provide thick green foliage have given way to orange and gold hues in time for winter.

Swept into neat piles by a gardener, few would know the route known as Duke’s Walk exists – tucked away less than five miles from the roar of the A90 and the bustle of Stonehaven.

Indeed it is not until the very last second that Elsick House comes into view, a historic former family home where royalty have frequented from Queen Mary to Queen Elizabeth II.

Like dozens of period properties the house is now used as a wedding venue, but plenty of secrets still reside in the many corridors and hideaway rooms.

It was previously home to the late James, Duke of Fife, who was the great-grandson of Edward VII, who rejected his inheritance of Kinnaird Castle in favour of the Aberdeenshire countryside and the anonymity which Elsick House offered.

It was left to his only son, David, to take on Kinnaird after the duke lived out his days in seclusion following divorce from whisky heiress Caroline Dewar.

The late duke’s love of the simple life is shared by his daughter-in-law Caroline Fife, who moved to Scotland from the home counties after her marriage.

Upon the duke’s death, she became duchess whilst her husband inherited the dukedom.

Wearing a stylish tweed jacket and soft wool jumper, Caroline is clearly used to presenting herself, which should come as no surprise for a duchess.

With an elegant jawline and neatly groomed hair she seems to have taken to the role, but chipped peach nail varnish gives the game away.

Despite the title and the castle which comes with it, Caroline prefers to keep out of the limelight to the extent that an online search brings up little information despite the age of social media.

She is at her happiest when with her horses and dogs and sees little point in fancy clothes for rural life.

But now that Caroline’s three sons have flown the nest and are living abroad, she is slowly carving out a new role and has brought Elsick House into the 21st century.

While Caroline makes it clear that she respects the family line, she is striving towards a modern future far removed from tradition and can normally be found mingling with locals rather than hosting high tea.

This is the first time she has openly spoken about life as a mother, wife and duchess all rolled into one – having been thrown into the midst of a titled family whose history can be traced back to 1367.

“I certainly don’t go around with my tiara on. I’d never deny my title and I’m not embarrassed but I’d never shout about being a duchess either,” she says thoughtfully.

“It doesn’t define me and I don’t really like being in the limelight. I don’t like having my picture taken, for example.

“David is exactly the same as his father, who was an incredibly sweet but very shy man.

“I remember coming to meet the duke for the first time and I was honestly terrified and a little bit in awe of my surroundings and the family name.

“I need not have worried. The fact I didn’t come from a titled family just didn’t come into things and he had a great sense of humour.

“Elsick House always seemed a very warm and friendly place. I’m a happy person in general and I’ve always felt comfortable here.”

We discuss the practicalities of bringing up three young children in a castle over mushroom soup in the kitchen, perhaps a dish which etiquette would suggest is eaten in a set way.

Caroline simply digs in, buttering crusty bread whilst laughing at the thought of stair gates in a period building.

“It was almost impossible to stop the children from racing around the place. We moved to Kinnaird with a three-year-old and a one-year-old,” she recalls.

“I met David through mutual friends at a Rocky Horror Show but we never really dated, and we knew each other for quite some time before we were a couple.

“I worked in PR in London and continued to do bits and bobs until our third son became ill – I just couldn’t keep the juggling act going.

“I tried to keep myself busy in this massive house but there were times when it was quite lonely and isolating.

“In the beginning I was terrified of the whole thing, the tweed and the pearls, whereas it’s a little different for David.

“He inherited Kinnaird from his grandfather because his own father didn’t want to take the castle on, so David’s whole life was spent waiting to take over.

“It was definitely expected of him and the mantle was always going to fall to David. This concept of a family name really matters to him.

“Our oldest son, Charlie, is in Asia but I think deep down he has already placed that same value on family and eventually he’ll want to take over.

“We’ve made sure that he gets to live his life though. He has a natural love of the estate but I wanted him to have a career.

“I call David the eternal student because he has studied a great many things but never quite got the chance to make a real go of something.”

Elsick House was left empty after the former duke grew too old to manage the property, and it proved impossible to find a long-term tenant.

Its future looked uncertain until Caroline stepped in and revamped the entire building, and even hauled furniture about in a bid to bring Elsick up to date.

She clearly loves Elsick House and wants others to feel equally comfortable, flinging her arms around through the maze of corridors and grand public rooms.

“My father-in-law came to stay with us at Kinnaird towards the end of his life, but he was very practical about Elsick House,” she recalls.

“The head of Shell rented the house for a while but when he left I knew we wouldn’t find someone else to lease it because it’s simply too big.

“We completely revamped the interior and our first wedding here was very special. It’s about finding ways to stay relevant and I wanted to make Elsick a happy place again after it sat empty for a while.

“For many people who own a big period property there’s a real battle to keep the show on the road, and if you want to enter the rental market then getting the required energy rating can cost thousands.”

When Caroline isn’t busy at Elsick, she can be found at Chapleton, which is a new community five miles south of Aberdeen.

New homes, schools and a town centre have been built on land which belonged to the Fife family and there is a vision of 8,000 homes within seven neighbourhoods.

“When we first introduced the concept of Chapleton I think my youngest son was expecting us to get pelted with tomatoes, but people were really receptive of the idea,” says Caroline.

“What I’ve loved most of all is seeing a community come to life and I love spending time there.”

She has a soft spot for Stonehaven in particular and can often be found enjoying the countryside or chatting with locals at Teacake – Chapleton’s very own cafe.

“I think I lead quite a simple life really and I don’t associate the title duchess with me as a person.

“I think this duchess title can come across as an ageing thing. It’s distracting and quite alienating really.

“I don’t see my life as that of a duchess, if such a thing even exists. I’m just Caroline.

“I’m happiest in my wellies. My husband always jokes that he married the gal groom but he’s probably right.”