Award-winning comedian and actor Omid Djalili is touring with his new show, Schmuck for a Night. Ahead of the show’s visit to Kirkwall, Wick, Inverness and Aberdeen, he sat down for a Q&A with Ben Williams.
Omid Djalili might now be known to millions for his roles in Hollywood blockbusters and west-end appearances, but he started his career in fringe theatre, moving on to the theatres of central and eastern Europe in the early 90s, and then the alternative comedy circuit.
Although he’s swapped dingy pub rooms for the big theatres, it’s still live on stage doing stand-up where he’s at his best. He’s currently touring and brings his new show, Schmuck for a Night, to the north this month. Ben Williams talked to him about keeping his mind sharp, being shot by a Rolling Stone and reading the Chilcot report in its entirety.
THE NEW SHOW’S CALLED SCHMUCK FOR A NIGHT. WHY SCHMUCK?
I like the word “schmuck”. It means “fool” or buffoon. You have to be a schmuck to do comedy in today’s climate. I’m embracing the schmuck in me to take on the big issues of our day. Plus, it’s a word that ends with “uck” which can only be a good thing.
I FOUND THE SHOW MELLOWER THAN YOUR OTHER TOURS. IS THAT FAIR TO SAY?
I’ve become less frenetic. I used to dance every two minutes in between the stand up. I can’t even remember why. It was mentioned to me that when I danced, audiences were laughing at me not with me. So it was either stop dancing or ban my manager from the gigs.
YOU TOUCH ON BREXIT, ISIS AND TRUMP IN THE SHOW. IT’S A LONG TOUR, WILL THE SHOW CHANGE WHILE YOU’RE ON THE ROAD?
It’ll be so current sometimes audiences won’t laugh until they get home and turn on the TV.
YOU PRODUCED A SHOW KNOWN AS THE “IRAQ OUT & LOUD” PROJECT AT THE EDINBURGH FRINGE, WHICH INVOLVED READING THE CHILCOT REPORT IN FULL, 24 HOURS A DAY. HOW DID THE IDEA COME ABOUT?
I was on the phone to Boothby in July when I said, “we should do a show at next year’s Edinburgh Festival where we just read the Chilcot report 24 hours a day”. He mentioned it to a promoter called Bob Slayer, and rang me back and said, “there’s a guy called Bob who’s mad enough to do it this year”. So while Bob was building a shed to stage it in, we were contacting all our friends in comedy to read it and kick the idea off. It took 285 hours and 1,444 people to read it. I read it too. It was a truly one-off experience.
DID YOU FIND ANYTHING FUNNY IN SUCH A SERIOUS REPORT?
Yes. It was in the final moments of the readings – after 285 hours and 1,444 people – the very last paragraph of the Chilcot report is: “How to read the Chilcot report”. It was a great punchline.
YOU WERE EXECUTIVE PRODUCER ON THE DOCUMENTARY WE ARE MANY ABOUT THE 2003 PROTESTS AGAINST THE WAR IN IRAQ. ARE YOU PROUD OF THE FILM?
It’s not a comedy, but you could easily say it’s my crowning achievement so far. I’ve worked on the project for the last five years, countless edits, screenings, meetings, discussions… the fact that Universal Pictures bought it, that it’s been so well received and hit number one on iTunes in about 10 different countries, you could say I’m very proud of it. A film promoting worldwide public opinion as a “Second Superpower” has got to be doing good.
WILL THE FILM AND THE CHILCOT REPORT READING MAKE A DIFFERENCE, DO YOU THINK?
In this life, you’re either a problem or a solution. I’d like to think these projects – which raise more questions than answers – are firmly entrenched in the solution camp. Or at least trying to be…
YOUR STAND-UP ISN’T PARTICULARLY POLITICAL OR AGENDA-BASED, THOUGH.
Well yes and no. I’m not party political if that’s what you mean. I have no party political agenda. But I’ll talk about what’s going on around us trying to contribute to the discourse… in fact that’s what the show should have been called: “Schmuck Talks About What’s Going On Around Him Trying To Contribute To The Discourse”.
AWAY FROM STAND-UP, YOU HAVE AN IMPRESSIVE ACTING CV AND HAVE WORKED WITH MANY STAR ACTORS. WHO’S BEEN MOST FUN TO WORK WITH?
That’s a tough one… I’d say, and anyone who’s worked with him as an actor would agree, Keith Richards, from the Rolling Stones, was probably the most extraordinary. He played the father of Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) in Pirates of the Caribbean 3. His character shoots and kills my character for no reason. This seemed to bother him. In fact, he shot me about 14 times and after each take he’d come up to me and say, “listen, you do know I don’t mean this?” After every take.
It was almost like a joke but it wasn’t. Bang! and he’d shuffle up and say “nothing personal mate, I hope you realise”. Then after another take, with the same sincerity and intensity, “it’s all acting. You know that. You’re not upset with me, are you?” Once he shot me and just said “forgive them Lord, they know not what they do”. The final time he shot me he just stood over me and mumbled “we’ve all got issues… it’s all about mummy innit?”
Omid Djalili: Schmuck for a Night is at the Pickaquoy Theatre, Kirkwall, on Sunday, February 19 (01856 879 900); The Assembly Rooms, Wick, on February 20 (01955 602 584); Eden Court, Inverness, on February 21 (01463 234234) and His Majesty’s Theatre, Aberdeen, on Thursday, February 23 (01224 641122). Visit www.omiddjalili.com for more information.
