Two women moved to the same street in Fittie at the same age, at the same time and with the same undiagnosed neurodevelopmental condition… What are the chances?
During the pandemic my neighbour Dawn-Marie Farmer and I moved in six doors apart. The first words Dawn said to me were: “Sorry if I talk too much, I think I have ADHD!”
Two years prior to that, I had been told by a friend that I presented with symptoms of the under-researched and misunderstood condition, which is a registered disability under the Equality Act 2010.
Having tried to obtain a diagnosis through the NHS and never reaching the end of the waiting list, this serendipitous meeting with Dawn spurred me back into action to get the answers and support I desperately needed. The diagnosis and subsequent treatment not only improved but actually saved my life.
On discovering the number of mis and undiagnosed ADHDers the world over, and the horrifying statistics on the dangers to the lives of undiagnosed ADHD people, us neurodivergent neighbours made it our mission to make some serious noise to raise awareness. Our hope was that we could help break the stigma and push for change, so that the sufferers of the condition can be treated both medically and with the respect in society that they deserve.
Dawn and I began documenting our ADHD diagnoses in a podcast called ADHD As Females (ADHDAF), recorded in Dawn’s fisherman’s cottage. We hoped that sharing our experiences would help others like us – and, unbelievably, it worked. We accumulated one million downloads and listeners in 196 countries.
Listeners report daily that the podcast led to their diagnosis, them accessing support at work, and even that psychiatrists as far away as New Zealand are recommending that their patients listen.
Peer support is invaluable when coming to terms with ADHD diagnoses
Having just begun her third year of 3D design at RGU, Dawn has stepped down from ADHDAF to focus on her studies. I’m continuing solo with both the live shows and podcast, featuring guests such as BBC Breakfast and ITV This Morning’s resident Dr Nighat Arif, best-selling authors Davinia Taylor and Clementine Ford, and local legends like Aberdeen’s We Too! charity founder Phionna McInnes, and neurodivergent coach Zoe Joanna.
I’m currently halfway through a Christmas tour, uniting the ADHD community in seven cities. I’m so excited to be back home and returning to Aberdeen’s Chester Hotel this weekend.
At all ADHDAF shows, attendees are encouraged to wear leopard print. The leopard is the symbol of Aberdeen, and it also symbolises the reclaiming of power. To have us all dressed similarly unites us, and it has become the uniform of the Leopard Print Army.
Peer support is invaluable when coming to terms with an incurable, later in life diagnosis. Many ADHDers feel isolated and alone in their struggles. It is essential that we have a community to lean on and learn from.
For any attendees nervous to attend an ADHDAF event alone, there are greeters at the door to seat them with others so they can make local, like-minded connections.
There’s a whole planet of us
At a time when mainstream media is dismissing a monumental moment of mass awareness as mass hysteria, the NHS is on its knees due to greedy governments making waiting lists for potentially life-saving diagnosis and treatment years long, and there is a global ADHD medication shortage, we need to support each other, now more than ever. ADHDAF is a safe space where we can unmask and own the parts of ourselves we’ve felt ashamed of and tried to hide.
All genders are welcome at our adults-only events. If you have or suspect you have ADHD, or want to learn more about the condition from an experiential perspective with some festive fun, come along. Leopard print and festive wear encouraged, no diagnosis necessary.
Self-diagnosis is valid, and in a system so broken that most ADHD women will not be diagnosed in their lifetime, it has to be!
To know that people who attended an ADHDAF event alone have left with local friends and with the knowledge that, despite a lifetime of feeling like an alien, there’s a whole planet of us, is the best Christmas gift I could ever wish for.
- An ADHD AF Christmas Laura takes place at Aberdeen’s Chester Hotel on Sunday, December 17, from 2pm
Laura Mears-Reynolds is an ADHD activist and co-creator of the ADHD As Females podcast
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