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What a week: Science, sausage rolls and the Sussexes

The proposed Greggs drive-thru in Westhill.
The proposed Greggs drive-thru in Westhill.

There’s been cause for celebration in the quest for new sources of energy – first a breakthrough in nuclear fusion and then approval for a Greggs drive-thru at Westhill.

A near limitless supply of clean energy is now within reach, as is a chicken and mushroom bake and regular cappuccino without anyone having to get out of a car.

I’m glad about the nuclear fusion innovation but I worry about the traffic tailbacks when everyone has to wait eight minutes for the sausage rolls to come out of the oven.

A major scientific breakthrough in fusion research is announced at the Department of Energy in Washington DC. Image: J Scott Applewhite/AP/Shutterstock.

The research in California has been hailed as a “momentous achievement” after scientists found a way to get more energy out of a reaction than they put in.

Funnily enough the same thing happened with the Harry and Meghan series in which they managed to spin out another three episodes by saying little more than they have said before.

It must be a California thing and my hope for both the scientists and the Sussexes is that they will move forward from this landmark moment and get on with the productive and positive work that we know they are all capable of.

Harry and Meghan vented more grievances against the Royal Family in their Netflix series. Image: Peter Dejong/AP/Shutterstock.

The duke and duchess are believed to have struck a deal with Netflix worth more than 100 million US dollars to deliver content for several years.

They might want a new agent when they find out that Boris Johnson has made more than £1 million from speaking engagements in just three months.

An update to the MPs’ register of interests revealed how much he has been paid to talk since being ousted as prime minister.

It is not yet clear how much he’s been offered to shut up.

Also making their voices heard were striking workers across a range of sectors.

Jenny McGee, the nurse who cared for Johnson when he contracted Covid-19, said that nurses have “had enough” and feel under “so much pressure every single shift”.

Nurse Jenny McGee, who has now resigned, at a Downing Street garden party with then Prime Minister Boris Johnson who she looked after while he was in hospital with Covid. Image: Andrew Parsons/Downing Street/PA Wire.

On the day that tens of thousands of nurses went on strike across England, Wales and Northern Ireland, John Swinney raised higher income tax rates to fund a £1 billion boost for the NHS in Scotland.

The SNP finance chief called it “a penny for patient care” in his budget which coincided perfectly with the sight of nurses on the picket line south of the border – you couldn’t schedule those optics could you?

In the same speech he pledged £50 million next year for the Just Transition Fund to help the north-east and Moray move away from a reliance on North Sea oil and gas which was welcomed in the region.

Nurses on the picket line outside St Thomas Hospital in London on Thursday. Image: Tayfun Salci/ZUMA Press Wire/Shutterstock.

In other news from Holyrood, 16 and 17-year-olds may be able to stand as candidates in elections as part of a series of reforms being considered.

I’m all for letting teenagers run the country – it worked out well for Harry Potter and infiltrating the Ministry of Magic is surely a much tougher gig than taking a seat in the Scottish Parliament.

Plus, given the SNP’s efforts to conjure some sort of independence referendum after the Supreme Court ruling, it might need a Department of Magical Law Enforcement.

On Tuesday a poll found that the Slytherins – I mean the Tories – face electoral annihilation all over Scotland and may lose nearly 300 seats at Westminster.

Cornelius Fudge, played by Rishi Sunak, this week tried to whip up a potion for power-sharing in Stormont, but with Professor Umbridge as his home secretary he’s never going to look good.

“Have you seen Dobby? He’s this high,” asks Home Secretary Suella Braverman aka Professor Dolores Umbridge. Image: House of Commons/PA Wire.

Someone who has given up on any attempt to look good is Donald Trump who has launched a range of digital cards featuring himself in various guises.

The trading cards resemble Pokemon collectibles and depict him as a superhero in cape and tights, an astronaut, a sheriff and a Top Gun-style fighter pilot in Aviator sunglasses and flying suit.

For the purposes of research I had a look at the website and wish I hadn’t.

I had been looking forward to streaming Top Gun: Maverick with Tom Cruise over Christmas, but now that big orange buffoon has ruined it for me – there are some things you can’t un-see.

Donald Trump depicted as a fighter pilot on the collectible cards.

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